General Forum

I like my balls tied & my anus dominated :-))

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Will you promise to dominate me, tie my balls so they are painful, and make me probe my anus with a pogo stick?

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I am all yours for as much pain and time as you wish :-))

Nearly everyone is dominated or dominates in everyday behavior. Few are the relationships---especially in marriage---where each party fully respects the freedom and desires of the other. But all of this occurs on a psychological and emotional level.

The whole BDSM--Master/Slave thing is simply an infantile manifestation of this natural human tendency acted out in ways that are decidedly laughable, but at the same time pathological. The "lifestyle"--as it is called with near reverential seriousness by its practitioners--is made more complex when elements of obsessiveness and delusional mania are also present. One can observe the self-appointed "Masters" who make the claim of some transcendental wisdom and who offer their services (for a fee of course!) as gurus or divine-like figures.

I don't believe that any experience of being dominated or dominating is good. That being the case, there is no "best" experience. One could only speak of a "worst" experience. As the German philosopher, Hegel (who influenced Martin Luther King) said, "None is free, until all are free."

Agree with u up to one point: is not pathological. The BDSM games are just another form of making the sexual life more out of ordinary.

If something is not our cup of tea, is better not to start judging ;)

G., I suppose one might argue that there are some who practice a relatively benign form of this, and not find anything pathological---or at least not acutely so. However, I don't see how anyone viewing the matter dispassionately could regard, for example, someone submitting to having a tennis ball inserted in one's mouth, being bound,blindfolded and submitting to a physical whipping causing pain and observable physical injury to the body could make the case that there is nothing pathological in this. It seems to me any mortification of the flesh, done by saints (so-called) or sinners (so-called) is man against himself. It is self-destructive behavior both physically and psychologically.

I agree with the general notion, 'each to his own taste'. I have no personal quarrel with anyone in regard of his behavior if it does not injure me or the society in which we live. I would not presume to judge anyone individually and shake my finger in his face. But just as I can arrive at a judgement that smoking cigarettes is bad without going about issuing personal condemnations, I can---as we all do---judge a thing to be good or bad. And my judgement is that the BDSM-Master/Slave thing is bad. It is not life affirming. It is not neutral. It is life destroying because its aim is to denigrate, humiliate and at times inflict physical pain on another human being, and that---in my judgement---is wrong.

is you practice domination.verbal domination!! LMAO!!

No. I read and welcome the opinions of others. That is the basis for a good discussion. When a question is posed, I try to answer it to the best of my ability. I make what I think to be a reasoned argument for my opinion. When responding to another participant in the thread, I try to fairly evaluate his or her opinion and tell this person why I agree or disagree. Of course, sometimes we are just cracking up about someone's good joke and we simply communicate a friendly, "Good one! Lol!"

its not what you say,its the way you say it.

i see wat u is sayin' dude.. may be i shud submit to bein re-ejucated.

(On a serious note, I get your point. But please understand, I'm an "old fart" and it's difficult to adapt to an idiom like chat-speak. It's difficult enough to try to converse with one sentence throw-away lines, but I cannot bring myself to write "you" as "u" or "great" as "g8." I am not saying shorthand precludes clear expression or that longhand guarantees it. It's simply part and partial of a larger syndrome of careless and murky writing, and murky writing makes for murky thinking. Aiming to simplify is a worthy goal and I hope--whomever thou might be today--that my efforts will meet with your every approval, so that my words never give thee or anyone the impression that I am trying to "dominate" with words and meet with your disapproval, whose judgement alone is final word. Wherefore, I implore thee for one last chance to demonstrate my devotion to your desires and yours alone. Your Humble and Obedient Servant, Melomane.) :)

...you mostly display a mild form of narcissicsm.

Wow, and you are a psychiatrist too? Thanks for the unsolicited diagnosis Doc, and glad to know it's only a "mild" form. However laudable your intention, your indiscretion in revealing it here constitutes an egregious violation of doctor-patient confidentiality and undermines what little confidence I had in your ability. I'm tempted to report you to the Medical Ethics Board, but I'll let it pass this time. Plus, you change your name so often, I have no idea under what name you are licensed....ahhh You ARE licensed, aren't you Doc?

if you'll excuse me, I'd like to get back to the thread. Why not join in Doc? Come on! Don't just stand there on the side observing and criticizing others. Surely a student of psychiatry should have some valuable inights to share about the dynamics of BDSM.

hit home! :-)

you tripped over your tongue,again.it wasn't me. pot calling a kettle black when you start talking name changes.

Since CC allows people to assume different names, there are those who apparently delight in palying a childish game of hide and seek or who simply find it convenient to wear a different mask each time they come out of their hiding place, not to join in a discussion, but to snipe at someone. If you are not among them, I applaud you for your willingness to post only under your screen name. As for your suggestion that I am a "pot calling the kettle black in criticizing the name changers," you can believe me or not, but I have never posted under any other name but Melomane.

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Charlotte, You shouldn't think just because I let you get on top last night, that you're 'da boss.' now! Lol!

In all seriousness, I understand that in some things expressions like "One man's heaven is another man's hell...One man's wine is another man's vinegar," are apt descriptions. But one cannot apply this kind of relativism to things that in-and-of themselves do not admit of such relativism.

You say, “What u see as being life degrading, for others it is life fulfilling, with the minor difference that they feel fulfilled by receiving or giving pain.” MINOR difference? My dear, I think this is hardly a minor difference. It's the very thing that distinguishes one as true and the other false. The mere assertion that something is good does not make it so if it is not good in essence. The ancient Greeks had the notion that all things aimed toward some good, but people were often mistaken about what they thought was good. In every case, however, the final aim was happiness. People might disagree about particular “goods,” but each believed that their perceived good would conduce to their happiness---or we might say, to use your word here---fulfillment.

Given the universal human aim of happiness, can we say that any perceived good will be a means to that end, or will some goods prove successful and others not? Doesn’t the well-worn expression, “The road to hell is paved with good intentions” suggest not all paths that are thought good prove to be so? As such, there are certain identifiable elements in the BDSM—Master/Slave view that would suggest it is less likely to arrive at the desired aim of happiness and fulfillment. These elements, which distinguish it from those of the conventional path, do not constitute a “minor difference.” Rather they are the very things that mark it a false path, not an alternative route to the same end.

Can the mere assertion that degradation and/or the infliction of physical pain are fulfilling make them so? It’s empirically true that some people want to be humiliated and degraded and will often submit to such treatment at the hands of another who has the apparent desire to be the active agent of degradation. This might take on the form of the roles played in various BDSM—Master/Slave scenarios, or simply play out without the accouterments and props of formal BDSM theatre. It is not uncommon for people to ask sexual partners to urinate and/or defecate on them. So, the verbal insult, “Shit on you pal,” with its implied consummate act of degradation, is actually requested by some people. That a given desire or need is “fulfilled” does not make such actions “fulfilling” in the broader, spiritual sense of the word. The desire to degrade life---one’s own life or that of another---does not equate with the desire to affirm it. −1 ≠ + 1. The two desires are not relative and interchangeable. Both are desires, but the former is a perversion of the latter. The former is a mistaken path that will miss the mark; the latter is a correct one that will hit it.

Aristotle defined happiness as an “activity of the soul in conformity with virtue.” One can, without much difficulty, make the case that it is virtuous to care for and love someone. However, I cannot see how anyone could think there is anything at all virtuous in the desire to be shit upon or the desire to shit on someone. Anyone who says there is, is talking shit!

Do you consider yourself a virtuous man?

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I don't like writing lots either Charlotte so I will just say I agree with what you said :P

Dose your post mean that you are into BDSM ? :(

Melomane your post reminded me a bit of a guy I know who complains about people "smoking too much" even though he himself smokes. If I have understood your post correctly it sounds to me like you are saying that people who indulge in BDSM are deluding themselves that it is making them happy and fulfilled. In other words do it my way or you are wrong.

The only thing I will agree with you on is that the BDSM thing is definetely not for me.

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Charlotte as English is a strange language what you said still made sense. The "you" in this case not referring to Melomane directly but to the population in general. Someone whose English skills are better than mine could probably explain it better.

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verbosity tends to weaken an argument and 'methinks he protests too much!'

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Happy Easter

you too! enjoy your day

Visit comchat, the rest will work it's self out.

Well,good questions,but what about such side of character as envy? You said about it and I would like to add,that in spite of it,there is other side. Why should i tell to others how much i have? If i work and earn,doesnt it mean i have a right to keep it in secret?If i want i will tell about without any lows or smth like that. Or others will not able to sleep without knowing how much I earn?Is like to ask person,how often he/she eats, pee,etc. Its just not polite.And is just a dream still about perfect society,where all like each other without envy.etc. And really, why should I compare myself with others who,for example,earns more? Does it mean I m worse?or what? but all people have their own personality and money helps to live with comfort,not to feel yurself as personality. yes,to know about eachothers salaries is great in only one event and for only one person,no,not person,it called state. for state and states organizations as tax office is very good to know ur real salary. in other cases,dont think is necessary. i dont want to know how much others earn, and dont want to tell about my salary. it would not make my salary bigger,just all my enrgy would spend for envy and comparing. and is always possible to say how much person really earns,just looking at house,clothes,shops she/ he visits,etc. no need to know salary for it.

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Yes,i understood ur thoughts,and smth says me that we live in the same country:) And if it so, we both know,what will happen:) Our national character will never agree with some things:) And by the way, for teachers,doctors,ect,there is such thing as tariff rates or smth like that,so its not a problem to know how much they earn. Is free information. Course,i dont say about bribes. Same with our government, sometimes in mass media an information about their incomes appears . So, as we can see in our country this way what u talk about is applied:)
Happy easter to u too:)

I have never hid that I'm from Russia.As for tariff rates you told be very correct "or smth like that".They are not clear it's "something like that".And you know many tariffs serve for leading away our eyes.The tariffs rates and real salaries are very often too different.So if ppl pay taxes to government wouldn't be so bad to know how much state workers earn.And what they do for this. Not like "something like that".But particularly.
Though seems it's just a dream.

all i want to know is your bust size ?

In the USA the public sector salary ranges are public information.

For instance a trash man makes $25000 - $35000 depending on experience, time on the job and special circumstances. You won't know how much Jim Smith earns, but you know it is between those numbers.

(I made up the amount and the job.)

You need experience to be a trashman?

Sure, you have to start out with waste baskets, then move up to grabage cans and then you aready to move up to the big league...trash dumpsters ( I hope to be there someday...sigh a man an dream can't he?)

Accountant, Effective x number of years ago, the job title "Trashman" was banished from society's vocabulary. The correct term for those who perform this function is Sanitary Engineer.

No fine will be issued for this first offense. I'm sure you can understand how calling something what it really is threatens the security of the nation. Calling a spade a spade might just excite the passions of a lot of people and interfere with our "war on terror." So, we'd like to offer you this booklet with a list of all words that have been banned in one column and their replacements in the other.

I know we can count on your patriotism and cooperation. :)

Here in the UK salary matters are very transparent, at least in respect of civil servants (state workers). There are publicised national pay scales corresponding to each grade of worker, so somebody's basic salary can be determined with a good degree of accuracy. It is only in the private sector (in those industries where national pay bargaining is not the norm) where salaries can be negotiated on an individual basis, and one might have no idea what the person sitting next to you is earning.

Gorty. Good questions.

1) No. I do not think it is a good idea generally, though there are some justifiable exceptions. I would oppose any national mandate. (I'm from the US)

2) The publication of salaries of public servants is justified. If the tax payers are paying the salaries, they have a right to know how their tax dollars are being spent. The publication of salaries of top executives in publicly held corporations is also justified and is the current practice. Here I would be in favor of still more transparency as regards a forthright reporting of all the other perquisites senior executives receive (the numerous homes financed by the corporation, the private jet or helicopter, the private limo with chauffeur, the "golden parachute" severance clauses in their contracts, etc). As it is now, the law requires the salaries to be published, including the stock options, but this still paints a false picture. Also, in spite of reforms, the US Congress has still not required that stock options be included as a "cost" in their financial reports, which again allows the corporation to report the profits to be greater than they really are. Accounting for the cost of potentially exercised options would be a more truthful picture.

As regards "side effects" if this was a universal practice, you and others have already alluded to it: envy is the principal one. Money and sex have at least this in common: Some people are very open about it; others very private. But I see no justification for a private economic contract between employee and employer to be public knowledge when there is no third party interest.

You answer your own question.

"...[V]ery often this causes envy and anger...' so why even suggest doing it?

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"Which side effects can such decree cause?"

I answered.

i think it would be good for people in the public sector where their wages are paid through taxes and such like to have the salary shown so that the people paying for them can see what their money is being spent on. but i don't believe it would be good in the private sector as it could cause jealousy between workers who are earning different wages for the same jobs just because the boss decides to pay them differently.

What country are going to do this? North Korea? Cuba or China?

Frankly, I think these three would be among the last places it would happen. But we can be reasonably sure that the ruling elite have access to luxury goods (French wines & cheeses, Swiss watches, Italian shoes, German electronics, etc.) from the West and that same were paid for in hard Western currencies.

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Ok, but I'm just curious what country they want to impose this? Don't take offfense if I don;t directly answer you question. Thanks

mmm, no response. guess the country in question was fictious

....that this unnamed country is Russia. Since these studios are unlawful under Russian law, none of the studio bosses will be reporting their income, huh? lol!

you think everyone is tisme!!

a few posts below"that wud.."is said to be him too.

thought you were!!

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looks like you're posting as awol as well.

'That wud' has has made accusation.
Some post under his appellation
Is 'that wud' 'tisme?'
Or 'awol', 'tis thee?
For Gorty it's all a fixation

First line should read: 'That wud' has made accusation.

it's ok, guess we noticed :-)

Thanks Bill. I'm honored you took the time to comment. Maybe one of these days I'll attempt to write a sonnet. I like yours a lot--especially # 29. (Btw, Bill, do you think you could lend me a few duckets 'til next Tuesday?)

sure! Loved a short story about Shakespeare being brought into modern times - went to college, took an exam on himself but failed! Bit like Elvis coming 3rd in a sound-alike competition.

lol!...or the screenplay (with names changed) for Casa Blanca being rejected by an agent on the grounds that it wouldn't make it!

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have a great holiday! god bless

God bless you all. :-))

i agree with pie :)

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enjoy your day pie god bless u too!

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I'm awaiting my sms :-w

Blasphemy!!!! Are you the Anti-Christ prophesied to appear among us?!! lol!

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Feck the egg painting ,,,, im spanking the monkey today .......

if that was a bad mood i look forward to your good moods.you raise the spirits of those around you

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can i have your eggs gorty?

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Hmm I've never thought about it as you put it. You give me something to think about. I see what you are saying. No currency is---at any given instant---more expensive than another. It's value is what it is and the cost of purchasing another currency is not relevant if one's economic transactions are confined to one's own economy. (Of course there are some effects of the currency's relative worth to foreign curriencies in the price of imported goods. One pays more for French wines now in the US because the Euro is much stronger than the dollar)

I lived in France for two years ('99-'01) and about the time I left, one could buy a Euro for $0.80. Now, of course, it costs about $1.30. With a gain of over 60% at a time when the stock market was moving south, it would have been a great move to transfer some savings from the US to France. But that all comes under the heading of "Coulda, Shoulda, Woulda." lol!

The dollar will become stronger as soon as Bush vacates the white house

That day can't come soon enough for me. If Nancy Pelosi had the guts to do what she is sworn to uphold, Articles of Impeachment would be drawn. How sad that Clinton was impeached for lying about a blow job. (At least the hypocrite responsible for this gross miscarriage of justice, Tom Delay, has been sent packing and has been indicted.) But how cowardly and politically expedient for Pelosi to do nothing when Bush has so clearly lied to Congress and the American people and subverted the Constitution!

ur facts are wrong! Clinton was guilty of lieing under oath, Delay was innocent on all counts, Bush jr acted responsibly in cleaning up Colin Powell's and the UN's mess from Desert Storm (Schwartzkopf wanted to finish it at the time), and yes Pelosi is guilty of granting government favors to Corporations her husband is a major stakeholder in!

Are you high?

Really pushing the smoking gas mask aren't you hun?

gas mask? do you fart throughout your show?

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Smoke me :-))

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Another Pie!!!???

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lol cool post olga.

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We are not here alone!!!

As for lonely, a good host always makes you feel like you are with them!!!!

(the crowd roars) YYEEEAhhhh!!!
Next time try not to bombard us with your silly questions that seem to be asked for no reason or no goal but seemed to be asked for the sake of hearing yourself talk. There is a saying "The only stupid question is the one not asked", but I'm not so sure of that anymore.

If you think I give up, you are sadly mistaken :-)

are you talking to yourself?

you would think so wouldn't you

Nope, imposters :) I will only post early morning after 7 am :)

so do I ... it's always after 7am somewhere in the world

My gosh, I'm a living joke :(

UK time bitch

You sound alot like Tisme, always seeming to attrack a negative response, related?

yes, it's me. how did you figure it out?

I would rather kill myself then be compared to that punk

what a pathetic existence you have.2 forum posters,it seems,have got your number.my life isn't so bad compared to your's.thank you!!!

someone has too much time on their hands.

yes I agree, get out more :-))

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enjoy your day!

I can do it with one post

Yes and have sex at the same time.

You can do it with your continuous 6th grade like questions.

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Yes.

She is called my wife!

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Finding love happens here just as it can anywhere men and women meet together... be sure.... it depends on what each person desires in thier own hearts and when a man and woman start to walk the same path together, soon they find they will notice each other in life.

Our plans together? We meet twice already and continue to meet again, we talk online mostly in Yahoo every day usually for hours, we make plans for when we can meet again, we use the phone and SMS, all until she can come be with me. It takes times, you can not do all in one day! I do all I can to make her day more pleasant and enjoyable as she is my precious lady.

She is most precious and most important to me!

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Miss Charlotte, so you speak from experince? What was so difficult, for you or for him? I am waiting to hear your story...

Then send me an e-mail and I will tell you... I don't feel confortable talking about it in public... The end is somethig like this: me, all alone, in a country and city where I knew only him ... I made it, but the price wasn't worth it... At least not in my opinion...

Check your CCMail... as we already have exchanged some emails... Talk to you soon...

I agre, mny ppl lke 2 fnd shtcts 2 evytng.

I found my part the other day but now I've lost it again. It's very small!

We will meet this summer, hopefully. We have been together on line for six months, sms, yahoo and phone calls.

lol, "hopefully", there's a sob story waiting to happen.

your life?

It is a sad commentary on today's world that so many people are so cinical. It is possible to find love in many different places.... and who knows where that place might be. Sure this is not the usual or preferred place to seek it.... but it can happen here as well as anywhere else. Of course you have to invest the time and be aware ..... but that is true if you find someone next door or down the street. Love is possible anytime and anywhere when two people find themselves compatible. There are risks and doubts whenever love blooms. So geez,,,,,, give those that feel they have found it here a break.. have a little compassion and less sarcasm.

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I don't hate this job, I find it interesting. But I do have my moments when I get very pissed off and then I just don't stay online.
If I would hate it I couldn't do it with a smile on my face. I would just look for another job.

naaa, I'd just move into a category where I can humilate and degrade members and still get paid to do it.

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As I read these answers... be sure of one thing.. even for hosts who say they are \"in love\".... it is ALL ABOUT MONEY! they just don\'t need to hate thier work as much.... lol

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I'm sure I spoke to her in chat last week - very pretty, very nice :-)

she gone about 2 weeks:(

her light went out

your's was never on.

how do you know? been peeking?

Enjoy your easter eggs!!!!

and enjoy ur holiday! god bless!

that your post and mine are fairly close and one after the other

austin,, if you preferring to xpunisher,, he is rude to host and members here, whats wrong with you

I think a case of double standards ringss a bell.

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"misery loves company" so they find it easier to try to drag others down to their level than trying to lift themselves up.keep freeballin' austin

thats awol,, that lifted me up, and good luck here at cc awol

Don't be so quick to assume. Maybe they have plenty of power in real life and this is just a continuation of their normal personality. Just a thought.

No

No Can Do, 'cause we ain't really two.

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Are you askin' him (yourself?) or tellin' him? Havin' a good time yet? Can you?

As it's not me I can't say "yes and have sex at the same time" to this one.